The majority of people use January as a reset button. We attempt to reign in all of the loose ends we let go of the year before and revisit how we can get back on track with what’s most important to us. For many of us pursuing our passions who haven’t taken our foot off of the pedal in months, January can cause an overwhelming amount of restlessness. Realistically, we still have overflowing to-do lists from September in our planners and are doing our best to narrow in on what we want to handle today versus what needs to be handled today. A “start-over” time doesn’t exist for us where the pressure is alleviated and we get to wipe our slates clean.
My immediate circle is rather passionate to say the least, which is a blessing. They’re climbing corporate ladders, working out and eating healthy, owning businesses, obtaining additional degrees, mentoring others, raising families and continuously elevating. They offer great advice, even greater solutions and have the tools necessary to get you through almost anything. We push each other, motivate each other and have a healthy way of competing.
One of the cons of these relationships is the insensitivity that comes with the trials we all face. Because we all work so hard, none of us are truly phased by the hardships of one another, instead we look for resolutions which may not always be the best route to go. My biggest disagreements with friends comes from unwarranted suggestions we exchange that could’ve easily been traded for a listening ear. After recently expressing some of my immediate goals with a few friends, coupled with a few excuses as to why I hadn’t already gotten it done, I left the conversation feeling discouraged. Not because I don’t trust myself to be capable of those things, and not because my friends don’t agree; I was discouraged because no one wants their plans and ideas picked apart.
The restlessness that meets go-getters like us in the new year can also cause our ability to listen to others to suffer. I know because I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum. We might say all the wrong things, or aggravate one another with what we unintentionally communicate. No matter how thick our skin is, any person passionate about anything is hungry for emotional stimulation from our usual support system. I trust my friends to have the best intentions for me and know not to take anything personally; but that doesn’t mean I didn’t wish I would’ve gone about it differently.
“Lock your dreams in a vault and throw away the key.”
Our passions are sensitive subjects. While we’re often anxious to bounce ideas off of others we trust and admire in hopes of their approval, many of us are at a stage where it might be too early to share those ideas. The lesson I learned was to let them mature and flesh out before sharing, as you might be subject to criticism which can weaken your motivation. Plans are sometimes best kept to yourself until they take better form. It’s possible that they can be diminished by even the most trusted outside influences. When we speak things into existence, that doesn’t mean you have to say them to anyone else. Protect your passions carefully until they’ve been groomed enough to comfortably be highlighted and don’t stop until you get there.